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sadaarualearnedalot

whenhewaswiththeshamonosmanywaysleadingawayfromtheself

helearnedtogo

hewentthewayofselfdenialbymeansofpainthroughvoluntarysuffereringoverovercomingpainhungerthirtitidness

hewentthewayofselfdenialbymeansofmeditationthroughimaginingthemindtobevoidofallconceptions

theseandotherways

helearnedtogoathousandtimes

heleftitselfforhoursanddays

heremainedinthenonself

butthoughthewaysledawayfromtheeselftheirend

neverthelessalwaysledbacktotheself

thosesaidhalfafledfromtheselfforthousandtimes

timesyedinnothingness

stayedintheanimal

inthestone

thereturnwasinevitableinescapable

ablewasthehour

whenhefoundhimselfbackinthesunshineorinthemoonlight

intheshadeorintherain

andwasonceagainhisself

anidaarthrandagainfelttheagonyofthecycle

whichhadbeenforceduponhimbyhissidelivedguvindaisshadowwalkedthesameparts

undertookthesameefforts

theyrarespoketooneanotherthantheserviceandtheexercisesrequiredoccasionallythetwoofthemwentthroughthevillages

tobegforfoodforthemselvesandtheirteachers

howdoyouthinkguvdasaidhalfAAspokeoneday

whilebeggingthisway

howdoyouthinkdidweprogress

didwereachanygoals

wehavelearnedandwillcontinuelearningyoullbeagreatshermanasadarthaquicklyyouvelearnedeveryexercise

oftentheoldshermannushaveadmiredyouonedayyoullbeaholymansadaarthr

icanthelp

butfeelthatitisnotlikethismyfriend

whativelearnedbeingamongtheshumanoasuptothisday

thisogguinda

icouldhavelearnedmorequicklyandbysimplemeansineverytavinofthatof

oftown

wherewherewhoorhousesesaremyfriendamongcarttersandgamblers

icouldhavelearnedit

sidarurisputtingmeonhowcouldyouhavelearnedmeditation

holdingyourbreathinsensitivityagainsthungerandpain

theyareamongtheserchidpeopleandsidathursaid

quietlyasifhewastalkingtohimself

whatismeditation

whatisleavingoneesbody

whatisfasting

whatisholdingonesbreath

itisfleeingfromtheself

itisashortescapeoftheagonyybeingaself

itisashortnummbingofthesensesagainstthepainandthepointlessnessoflife

thesameescape

thesameshortnummingiswhatthedriverofanoxyartfindsintheindrinkingafewbowlsofricewineorfamentedcoconutmilk

thenhewontfeelhierselfanymore

thenhewontfeelthepainsoflifeanymore

thenhefindsashortnummbingofthesenses

whenhefallsasleepoverhisbowlofricewine

hellfindthesamewatciiarthurandguvindafindwhentheyescapetheirbodiesthroughlongexercisesstayinginthenonself

thisishow

itisguvinda

youresaysooh

friendandyet

youknowthatcidarthaisnodriverofanoxcartandashamanaisnodrunquid

itstruethatadrinkanonymshissenses

itstruethathebrieflyescapesandrests

buthellreturnfromthedelusionfindseverythingtobeunchanged

hasnotbecomewiser

hasgatherednoenlightenment

hasnotrisenseveralstepsandcidarthaspokewithasmile

idonotknowiveneverbeenadrunkket

butthatisaidarthurfindonlyashortnummbingofthesensesinmyexercisesandmeditations

andthatiamjustasfarremovedfromwisdom

fromsalvation

asachildinthemothersroom

thisiknowogavinda

thisiknow

andonceagain

inanothertime

whencidarthalefttheforesttogetherwithguvindatobegforsomefoodinthevillage

fortheirbrothersandteachers

sydarthabegantospeak

andsaidwhatnowoguvdamightwebeontherightpath

mightwegetclosertoenlightenment

mightwegetclosertosalvation

ordoweperhapsliveinacircle

wewhohavethoughtwewereescapingthecycle

wehavelearnedalotathalthur

thereisstillmuchtolearn

wearenotgoingaroundincircles

wearemovingupthecircleisaspiral

wehavealreadyascendedmanyalevelhowold

wouldyouthinkits

ouroldvulnerableteacher

ouroldestonemightbeaboutsixtyyearsofage

hehaslivedforsixtyyears

andhasnotreachthenavana

hellturnseventyandeighty

andyouandme

wewillgrowjustasold

andwelldoourexercises

andwillfast

andwillmeditate

butwewillnotreachthennavana

hewont

andwewont

ibelieveoutofalltheshumanaisoutthereperhaps

notasingleone

notasingleonewillreachthenavana

wefindcomfort

wefindnomeness

welearnfedstodeceiveothers

butthemostimportantthing

thepathofparves

wewillnotfind

ifyouonlyspokeofindawouldntspeaksuchterriblewords

sidathurhowcoulditbethatamongsomanylearnedmenamongsomanybrommansamongsomanyausteerandvulnableshshamanersamongsomanywhoaresearchingsomanywhoareeagerlytryingsomanyholymen

noonewillfindthepathofpaths

butsidaarursaid

inavoice

whichcontainedjustasmuchsadnessasmocery

withaquiet

aslightlysad

aslightlymockingvoice

soongovdayourfriendwillleavethepathoftheshemanas

hehaswalkedalongyoursideforsolongimsufferingofthirstdoggainda

andonthislongpathofashaammana

mythirsthasremainedasstrongasever

ialwaysthurstedforknowledge

ihavealwaysbeenfullofquestions

ihaveaskedthebroramansyearafteryear

andihaveaskedtheholyvadersersyearafteryear

andihavekedkedthevolvshamanasyearafteryear

perhaps

ithadbeenjustaswell

hadbeenjustassmartandjustasprofitable

ifihadaskedthehornbillbirdorthechimpanzzee

ittookmealongtime

andimnotfinishedlearningthisyettogowinda

thatthereisnothingtobelearned

thereisindeed

nosuchthing

soibelieveaswhatwerefertoaslearning

thereisomyfriendjustoneknowledge

thisiseverywhere

thisisattman

thisiswithinmeandwithinyou

andwithineverycreature

andsoimstartingtobelievethatthisknowledgehasnoworseorenemythanthedesiretoknowitthanlearning