Feel like struggle and the pain,

Are the only thing I know my soul shattered in pieces,

As I slowly loose my mind,

I watch it fall apart,

Front row seat to the fall of the man who never was is my life on the daily,

They say time flies but minutes feel like hours stretched thin by the depth of my agony,

I am now a slave of my darkest fears,

The courage and the confidence been exciled from me,

The fire and the vigour now is all watered down,

I drown deep in my despair,

Shame and the fear be my new master,

More I try to find myself,

More I realize that I'm nothing more but an illusion,

I keep rediscovering myself making it harder for me to hold on to any single one version of me,

I can now comprehend the scale of my irrelevance,

I am no main character,

Oh no no,

I am just a cog in a machine,

Right from my genesis,

Which was never a choice when I think about it,

Crazy how things could have gone a million different ways right there and then,

It was all mere chance nothing more,

As I peel back the layers that make me as I am,

I am stranded in an endless void,

My whole life flashes before me as my mind takes me back in time,

To when I was less aware,

Feels like I was walking in darkness,

My perception an illusion was the light,

Whether accurate or not the show it never stopped to warn when I was wrong,

And so I just went on immersed in all events,

Orchestrated by some forces which were greater than me,

I really I'm a product of the environment,

The choices that I make pre determined by experiences of previous events,

In addition to micro details flowing through my veins,

Whose effects are inconceivable by my own mind,

Everyday emotions cloud my judgement,

I don't even notice but how could I,

Feeling like a pre coded machine submerged in a reality created by those before me,

Must be why somebody from long ago said every man is a creature of the age in which he lives and very few are able to raise themselves above the ideas of the time,

That nigga really seen the light like me dawg,

Not a lot of things out here for me worth doing,

Only thing I wanna do is rhyme cuz I swear it feel transcending,

Something else is taking over when I pen it down,

Like I'm writing backwards,

Quran type shit,

Type of shit that blow your mind when you read it,

Finally I feel at ease,

The rage inside quiets down,

Then I slowly piece it all when the light illuminates,

Show me things I never saw,

Till I'm blinded by the light but the vision seem more clear,

Like messiah I'mma preach I'mma show you of the way and of the light follow me and I will lead you to a whole new beginning.